The Miracle of Birth

If you haven't already heard Jason is a Daddy!!  Sage was born on Monday morning and she and her new Momma are doing great.  Jason saw his little girl shortly after she arrived and was thrilled and we heard he has had a big grin on his face ever since.  :D

David has been saying for weeks that he felt Jason would have a big positive change once he saw his daughter and it appears he is right!  When we spoke to Jason Tuesday night he sounded almost like himself.   He is so proud and you could hear the happiness right thru the phone.  He told us things were only going to go up again from here and we pray this will give him the next jump start.
(Not that he hasn't continued working hard in therapy but it isn't easy and he still has far to go.)  When we asked about Sage's  hair he tickled us by saying, "She's a good combination of her parental influences."  Carolin told us he is holding her like a pro and wants to be at the hospital with his new family alot of the day.

Last night we got to go up to the hospital and see them in person.  We ran into Jason in the hallway and he very steadily led us right to Carolin's room.  As soon as we saw our new granddaughter bundled up in Carolin's arms we were in love!  She is 8 lbs of sweetness!  Though Carolin is having some pain from the surgery she overall feels good and she looks wonderful. Carolin agrees there is a lot of Jason in her face and apparently she is already sleeping with her arms up by her head just like he does!  David and I both got to cuddle Sage and then it was time for a few pictures.  It was very emotional to see Jason holding his daughter.  To think that less than three months ago we were sitting by Jason's bedside at the hospital Brain Trauma Unit praying so longingly for him to wake up and get to this moment in unbelievable.  These are truly miraculous pictures and a testament to his strong will to be there for Carolin and his child.

We have pictures with David and each of his children with their newborns in the hospital but up until recently it was still uncertain if we would get to have one with our beloved Jason.  After so much pain and so many prayers these past few months the feeling of joy to have these happy moments is almost overwhelming.

 

 

With each new life comes the promise of a new start.  And I thought what one of Carolin's close friends said is perfect - this isn't the start of a new chapter but the start of a whole new book for Jason and Carolin!

 

 

 



So Thankful

I am so thankful that everyone we know has come through Hurricane Sandy safely!  Perhaps some structural damage,  loss of trees,  loss of electricity, etc. - but nothing that can't be replaced.  My heart goes out to those who lost entire homes and even more the loss of loved ones.

Jason is doing well physically and will soon have his opthomology appointment to determine if there is permanent damage to his right eye or if it on the path to hopefully full use again.   The paper work for Acadia looks like it's gone thru and any day the letter should arrive to confirm that.  This afternoon Jason had a tour of the facilities and hopefully he will be as excited as we are with all of the wonderful  things they offer.  As he has been regaining more and more understanding, one of the biggest things at the moment is helping him deal with feeling badly about what he's lost and the hard work ahead of him.   Acadia specializes in TBI patients and knows this is common and normal and Jason will be going to some of the sessions geared towards helping him to cope with this.
It's very painful watching him begin to go thru what we know, from reading and talking to other TBI patients, is normal.  We try to tell ourselves this is actually a good sign but it is so hard knowing the frustration he is feeling.

Last Saturday Allison, Mia, and my Mom, (Jason's Grannie), drove up to see him for a little while.  It was a little sticky at first when he decided he didn't want to see anyone that day but eventually he did visit with them.  He especially seemed to enjoy playing with Mia.

 

David and I are hoping to take him and Carolin to brunch this Saturday at one of their favorite restaurants, (Cracker Barrel), and hope that will be something he will want to do and enjoy.

With all of the devastation from Sandy it's been hard to ask for prayers and financial help but this is the weekend of Ruby's Give Back fundraiser for Jason - Nov. 3-4-5 so perhaps knowing you are getting a meal at the same time you are helping Jason will encourage everyone to come for a meal - or several meals - at one of the Frederick locations.  We are probably going to be there at 6:30 this Saturday night if anyone wants to join us.   Don't forget to go to the fan page to download a flier to bring along so your 20% gets donated!

And please add some prayers for Jason's continued growth and to give him the strength and courage to keep fighting this tough battle!

SEEING IS BELIEVING

If anyone doubted that all of your prayers work I hope this next piece of awesome news keeps you going - Jason's right eye has greatly improved!  We were so excited to see him yesterday and once we pulled up I let Carolin know we had just arrived and the next thing we know there is Jason walking out the front door standing tall and walking straight with confidence.  After seeing how much the loss of his peripheral vision in that right eye had been affecting his walking last time we saw him,  we were so happy!  It's been obviously getting better the past week or so and in hopes of this progress continuing they are waiting another week to see the opthomologist to give that eye even more time to heal on it's own.  How cool is that???  With all my heart I truly thank everyone who have been Jason's Prayer Warriors!

We had a good visit and got lots of chatting in.  When I asked if he watched any good shows lately he remembered watching, "Revenge", the night before which was great as it's his short term memory that he is having problems with.  He is really working so hard to improve everything - during that day's PT he had not only leg pressed a good amount of weight but when told he could stop he wanted to keep going.  Go Jason!  Hopefully it will only be another few weeks for the paperwork to be completed and he can start at the Acadia Neuro Rehabilitation which is about 20 minutes or so from the house.  There he will go full time Monday-Friday from 9-3.  When I said to Jason it will be just like a school day he said, "Oh boy."  Oh yes I love every sarcastic comment!  :D

At the end of last week he started telling people he wanted to go to Frederick which was another big moment - in fact David got a suprise phone call from him last Thursday which he started by saying, "Hi Dad this is your son Jason."  David was so thrilled and Jason sounded very enthusiastic through out the phone call.  At one point he asked his Dad if he was going to be home that evening as he wanted to drive down that night.  With his eye improving and continued memory gains that will hopefully be a reality sooner rather than later! 

A few weeks ago I had told everyone about the box O.A.R. had sent for Jason and Brian had delivered to him.  Here is a picture of some of the generous gifts they sent:

Today he had a follow up with his main overall Dr. from Bryn Mawr who was very happy with his progress.  In fact Jason is eating and drinking so well now that he took the PEG tube out of his stomach - Jason is totally tube free at his 10 week mark!

The flyers are up on Jason's Fan Club page on FB for the Ruby's Give Back event going on November 2, 3, and 4th so make sure to print a bunch out for the Frederick location(s) of your choice and mark your calendars for another weekend of no cooking!  (Give them to everyone you know so they can enjoy staying out of the kitchen too!)

Updated Updates

Jason may be at home in Lancaster but that doesn't mean he has had any easing up of his hard working therapy.  Yesterday he began with doing simple daily tasks such as throwing trash away, using scissors, and putting the leash on the dog.  He also did some speech therapy - practicing opposites, finishing sentences, matching the words with the pictures - and he did very well.   Of course he was a bit confused when he first got out of Bryn Mawr - totally normal for someone with a TBI - but he is doing much better with the familiarity of therapy once again started. 

This morning he began part time outpatient therapy where they began evaluations for his new outpatient treatment.  (He will switch to full time but of course there is paper work they are waiting on!)  Even while doing evaluations his progress is evidenced by improvement with reading and directions.

I did talk to Jason on the phone this afternoon and that was awesome!  (Not to say that my heart wasn't wrenched when first talking to him just realizing we have so far to go until he sounds like himself.  And yes worrying if he ever will.)  I told him how much I missed him, loved him, and couldn't wait to see him again.  Seeing him and speaking to him no matter in person or by phone gives me such an elated feeling - as silly as it may sound it's almost like I'm holding my breath the whole time!

Hopefully it won't be too long until Jason's right eye can be assessed in full.  Basically they need to make sure he can accurately tell them what he sees and doesn't see before making any diagnosis. (Or perhaps by the time this happens he will be seeing just great out of that eye!)

Hopefully too, over the next several weeks, Jason can get to the point where he can begin to understand the magnitude of what together,  all of us who love him and admire him so much, accomplished together last Friday night at the benefit.  If you haven't gotten word yet the www.thejasonshepardbenefitfund.com is staying up and the donate button has been changed from ticket sales to regular donations so those of you who want to can continue to use that. Also if you didn't get a Livin on a Prayer benefit band and would like to purchase one please let me or one of his siblings know and we will get one right out to you!  There are some other ideas out there for further updates to the site so keep an eye out for that.

In the meantime keep the weekend of November 2, 3, and 4 open for another Ruby Tuesday's benefit at both of the Frederick locations who did a great job last time they so generously donated 20% of profits to Jason.  I'm sure the Shepard clan will once again be there in force one of the nights and will let you know if anyone is interested in joining us at that particular time(s). (The two Frederick locations reported almost $450 from the last donation weekend and perhaps there will be even more once Lancaster gives their report.)

As usual I will end by asking everyone to please continue your prayers for fast growing brain cells, healing of his right eye, continuance of Jason's building his strength up, and peace and understanding between all of us who love him with all of our hearts!

WORDS CAN NOT EXPRESS

There are no words to express how grateful and astounded our family was by the turn out and generosity of Jason's incredible friends and family at the benefit on Friday evening. There were people there who had come from Maine to Florida!  Every one of the awesome items for the silent auction and raffle were donated in full so that all the raised funds could go to Jason.  The beer kegs were donated by Barley & Hops and two of The Prime Choice's best, Jose and Diana, donated their time in Jason's honor to make sure everyone enjoyed yummy food all evening.  We also want to give a shout  out to Rabbi Dave Finkelstein who donated the use of Shoresh Ballroom.

Jason's brothers and sister and spouses all worked extremely hard in a little over a month to pull this fabulous evening together.  There is nothing worse than the helpless feeling we all had after Jason's accident and Jason's siblings and their spouses put all their energy and love into doing something positive they knew they could do for him.  I can not be prouder of the love and commitment they have for their brother and each other.

Brian and Jenn , Aaron and Lindsay, Andre and Allison

 

 

They all spent the whole day getting things ready and setting up

 

 

 Jenn designed the centerpieces herself

 

 

 

 

Next to set up were the raffle items.  Thank you again for opening your hearts and buying so many raffle tickets!  What a great idea to be able to put tickets towards only the items you wanted.  Lots of people went home happy with Vera Bradley wallets, Chipolte gift cards, Ruby Tuesday gift cards, baskets filled with special items, passes to Skate Frederick, assorted other certificates to local restaurants, and more.

 



Even before 7:00 people started arriving and Shirley Moore and I were busy checking the pre bought ticket guests in, helping people who were paying at the door, and selling additional wrist bands, raffle tickets, and giving out auction numbers.

 



A highlight of the evening was being able to tell everyone of you who have been prayer warriors for Jason that he had arrived at Carolin's parents house in Lancaster that morning and would be sleeping in his own bed that very evening.   When Brian made the announcement it was awesome to listen to the cheers and yells!

 

Next up were two performances choreographed by Jason's cousin, Chrissi Shepard Haines, who is the second oldest of the 9 Shepard cousins.  Just as all of them, she has been praying hard as well as starting prayer chains at her church.  Her team of dancers from the Mid Maryland Performing Arts Center did a great job with a jazz number.

 

  

 

But it was the second lyrical piece that had me crying from the moment it began.  Especially when  Chrissi introduced it by saying she had choreographed it in honor of a student at the dance studio who was fighting against cancer last Spring.

 

 

Brian was a phenomenal Master of Ceremonies who kept the evening lively and moving and used his DJ skills as people danced in between the dancers and Rich Cook's moving performances.

 

 



Rich Cook has been friends with all three of our boys since elementary school.  He graduated from high school with Jason and even beyond that stayed friends with him.  He and Brian shared a townhouse together for several years and even now he and Brian play softball in a league together.  Rich is an incredible singer and made for another emotional part of the evening when for his 3rd song he surprised us with turning the Shepard family "anthem" - Living on a Prayer by Bon Jovi - into a very moving acoustical performance. 

 

 

 

Everyone next had fun with a live auction for three huge baskets put together by Katie Schwartz who sells Tastefully Simple items - yet another friend of Jason's since high school who also did a Disney internship with him.  I had my heart set on one with all kinds of sweet cookies and brownie mixes and drinks such as Hot Chocolate and Chai tea and ended up in a bidding war for a bit - I was so relieved when I won it!  ;)

 

Our awesome auctioneer, Jon, and his wife, Krasi, are old high school and college friends of David's and mine.  We hadn't seen each other for many many years but reestablished a connection thru FaceBook.  As soon as Krasi read about Jason's accident she has been emailing and messaging me almost daily with support and prayers.  Once they learned about the kids doing a Silent Auction they insisted on donating their time and experience as this is something they have done for many large events.

 

The silent auction was a huge success - all of you were so truly giving and our hearts were full of excitement as totals were added up and the realization of just what had been accomplished for Jason hit!  Here are just a very few items that were being bid on along with 3 and 4 day weekend trips, signed Broadway memorabilia, a beautiful original painting of our cottage in Maine, and on and on.

 

 

Signed Redskin Mini Helmets donated by Brian Shepard

 

 

 Since Jason was so active in both high school and college in theater it's no surprise that several friends went on to work on Broadway.  One of his college friends, Ariane, was able to get us two tickets to see Wicked on Broadway.

 

 Jenn was able to get the Redskins to send a signed football and there was a lot of beautiful jewelry donated by a friend who didn't even know Jason who sells Cookie Lea jewelry.

 

 

There were Vera Bradley purses donated by Catherine, who works for a PR company in Seattle, WA, who David has worked with, (she also very generously donated the VB wallets).  Amongst other collectibles there was also retired Disney memorabilia.

 

 



 There were so many times I was brought to tears, as I'm sure many others were.  It really hit me hard when seeing Aaron and Brian doing things together through out the evening and not seeing Jason's familiar face with them as it usually is.  It was especially moving when Kevin Moore took the mike.  The Moores and the Shepards have been like family since Jason's freshman year of high school when he and Kylene Moore (Beshore), did their first theater production together and then went on to also do a Disney College Internship together.  He tearfully described how much he was affected when hearing about what happened.  He was temporarily working out of the country at the time and he described the nights he stayed awake praying for Jason's life and recovery. 

We will never be able to come close to showing our appreciation for all of your selfless giving, prayers, and thoughts.

Jason is really just beginning the hardest part of his journey.  His fight for full recovery is far from over and we continue to need your prayers and support. Starting Tuesday he will be going to outpatient rehab all day five days a week.  Jason's brothers and sisters have decided to leave the donation button up at www.thejasonshepardbenefit.com,  and Matt Kinney, who started the Jason Shepard Fan Page, as well as pulling together the last Ruby Tuesday's fund raiser has done it again and the first weekend in November Ruby Tuesday's will once more be donating 20% of all sales at both Frederick locations.  (I'll post more information up in the next day or so and it will also be on the Jason Shepard Fan Club page.

I promise to keep you all updated on his progress every few days.  Here's to all of you who continue to stand by Jason's side and believe me he can feel it!

Healing Prayers Still Needed!

Walking into Jason's room there is always a little apprehension for us wondering how he will be doing.  Saturday morning we walked in just after his first physical therapy appointment of the morning and the apprehension disappeared immediately - he looked great!  Right away was the familiar, "Hi Mom", "Hi Dad".  It feels so good to give him a kiss and feel him give a kiss back.  Such normal things in the past are now enough to make us sky high!  We had brought up some benefit bands and Carolin put hers on right away.  We've been wearing ours non stop and it really gave us a feeling of solidarity at being united for Jason.

  We spent the morning chit chatting with him and Carolin.  This week we really felt more like he was connecting with most of what we were saying.  At times he does answer a question with something that is just out of the blue and makes no sense or tell us something that Carolin then has to remind him didn't actually happen.  It's unnerving, (though sometimes you just have to laugh), but then we remind ourselves how just a few weeks ago he was only saying a few words and seemed unable to concentrate for more than a short time and then would be exhausted.  We remind ourselves it's only been 7 weeks and how determined and hard working he is that he's already at this point.  We remind ourselves that the power of healing prayers still surrounds him and helps keep his momentum going.

At lunch time we told him we would get anything he wanted to eat.  We discussed some options but as soon as Carolin mentioned Chipolte that was the end of the discussion - he was definite about that being his choice!  Yet another normal thing that thrilled us - getting to eat our first meal with him since mid July.  He even choose to walk to the patient dining room on his floor rather than using his wheel chair - another first for us to see!  He was tending to walk towards the right and needed just a little guidance from Carolin but how cool to see him walk in, sit down on a regular chair, and use a fork!  He had half of a burrito bowl on his plate so it was hard to see him only eat a few bites before putting his fork down and saying he was full.  He is so painfully thin I had to bite my tongue not to urge him to eat more.  After lunch it was almost time for his next physical therapy session and again he chose to walk to the therapy room which was down the other end of the hall rather than have Carolin get his wheelchair.  They really have him do alot during the 30 minute PT!  They started out doing a lot of walking and then twisting towards the therapist to hand her the ball while walking.  During this is was very evident he was pulling towards the right and would have walked into the wall if she hadn't guided him away from it.  Carolin told us this was all part of the worry about his right eye as they think he can't see from certain angles or it may be his right peripheral vision.  Since he can't always find the correct words to communicate they haven't done any complete checks on this but plan to in the next week or so.  It was even more worrisome when cones were set up in front of him to walk between and he missed the ones closest to him on the right side.  When asked to count the number of cones he got that immediately as well as the colors of the cones but when asked to count how many were on the right he again missed the closest two.  It was painful for us to witness this though Carolin had already told us about it.  We are praying like crazy this is a temporary problem that will resolve itself and not any permanent damage.

After physical therapy we walked back down to the patient dining room for his speech therapy.  He gets very distracted when others are around so we sat behind him at another table where we could still hear what was being said.  Just as in PT - his speech therapy session had a lot packed into it.  They did some matching of pictures and words, (not easy for him), some flash cards where the therapist shows him objects he has to name, (some came easy and some were far harder for him), and she also goes thru a lot of verbal questions for him to answer.  It really hits you how far he still has to go when she asked him if his parents were visiting today and he answered he didn't think so.  However when asked his mother's name he immediately said, "Amy", and asked his father's name, again he immediately said, "David".  We were glad to stay a few extra minutes with her afterwards to get some reassurance that his was normal and he had come a long way from a few weeks ago.  We can only once again pray that he is the exception to the rule and regains his short term memory much quicker than normal.

Back in his room he was in bed for a well deserved rest.   It was neat to see him watching TV as before this past week he was not even interested in turning it on as it was too confusing for him.  Who would ever think you would be happy to see someone watching TV while you were visiting!  We talked about the baby and he said he was excited - again a change from a few weeks ago when we were afraid to even talk about it in front of him.

Carolin told us that today he again talked about how excited he is about the baby and has remembered for several days now that he is at Bryn Mawr.   They've also started working with him with money and though he gets some of the coins mixed up he's doing pretty well.

It is astounding how much can happen with a head injury - and from just where that head injury occurs.  There is so much excitment at the progress Jason has made and watching his determination to do all he can and push himself farther.  And yet there are days I have to stop myself from crying with longing to have him talk to me the way he did before the accident and worry if he will ever be the same again.  Those are the times to quickly turn to the miracles that have happened in only 7 weeks - a long 7 weeks to be sure - but Jason is amazing people who see this every day and that is something to hold on to. 

There continue to be auction and raffle items arriving.  Thank you so much to those who have pounded the pavements, been putting fliers up, and emailing anyone who has known Jason to join us in our effort to make sure his only concern is continuing the fight to get himself back.  He and Carolin have many long hard months ahead and this benefit is so important!  Please click on the link and buy your tickets!

 www.thejasonshepardbenefit.com.

 

My cousin, who owns a large PR firm, helped the kids send out a press release last week and it's been picked up by the Lancaster Daily newspaper.  She will be interviewing Carolin today so those of you in the Lancaster area keep a look out for the article in the next few days highlighting Jason and the benefit.  (If there is anyone who has connections to the Frederick News Post or Gazette, or radio stations, we would love to get them to cover the event!)

Your prayers have done so much for Jason - please please continue to send them up for him and especially his right eye to be healed soon!



Jason and Carolin September 2012

Making it Happen

Thanks to everyone who reads this blog and continues to spread the word!  We are constantly hearing of someone who knows someone who tells someone and Jason is added to yet more prayers for continued healing.  Carmen, one of Jason's college roommates, loved that Jason has wanted Chipolte so much and was inspired to write and send the blog post about it being his first solid meal on to the company.  Within a day they had written him back wanting to help! (Hmmm guess what some items being raffled/auctioned off might be!)

This week Jason has also been enjoying some other treats.  Carolin has been going out to get foods to tempt him and on Monday he had pizza and cheesecake.  At this point they are lowering the food he is receiving thru his PEG tube, (though they feel he's not drinking enough so he is getting additional water thru it).  They've also started to give him his meds orally with some applesauce which is great news in terms of a step towards going home.  It was great to also hear that he no longer needs his 4x daily nebulizer treatments and he's now on an as needed basis only.  Hurray!

His walking is going great!  A few weeks ago he was leaning too far backwards and really having trouble being upright to move forward - now he is capable of walking the length of a football field and yesterday was given permission to walk around his floor with Carolin.  (Although she did say he is still a little hesitant about that and tends to feel more comfortable in the wheelchair - but that is very temporary feeling I'm sure as he gains more and more confidence.)  His physical therapists have been working hard with him on balance, reaching things on his knees, and continuing stair climbing both up and down.  He's also making great strides in reading and writing.

We were amazed to hear he is tying his own shoes and getting dressed by himself.  More steps towards being able to go home! 

His short term memory - as is so common in traumatic brain injuries - is not where it needs to be yet. Now that the physical daily things seem to be moving forward at such a rapid pace we are praying like crazy that he will be able to retain day to day memories soon.  He did tell Carolin he knows he was hit in the head and we have been told that most accident patients don't remember the actual accident or their hospital time.  (Which I'm thinking is a good thing!)

So as we edge closer to Jason being able to leave the rehabilitation hospital there are so many new things to think about.  While it looks like he will be able to go up and down the steps so he and Carolin can stay in the bedroom and bathroom upstairs where they had been  - he will most likely need a wheelchair for longer trips for awhile until his strength and stamina is back to normal.  For that he will need to be going to daily physical therapy.  He will also need daily outpatient sessions to help improve his memory amongst other things.  All of this is going to be tough on both of them once our next sweet baby granddaughter is born.  There is no way to know when Jason will be able to work again and for him that is going to get more and more frustrating as he realizes it we're sure.  He's already made some comments which we try to reassure him not to worry about.  Meanwhile Carolin is really going to have her hands full with a newborn and a husband who needs her attention.  She will have help from her family, our family, and friends, but what a daunting thing to face!  That's why we feel so passionate about the benefit on October 12.   With so much on their plates it is a wonderful gift we can give to them to at least be able to tell Jason - just get better and don't worry about anything else!   It's time for Team Jason to make miracles happen again!

www.thejasonshepardbenefit.com